Important Market Research

Those lovely people at Hubermann’s have been in touch regarding the Hooting Yard Christmas Gift Guide. Anticipating vast hordes of shoppers sweeping into view from the blasted heath beyond the vintage carpark, they have asked me to do a spot of market research so they have some idea of what to stuff into the bin outside the bargain bin basement. Please help by indicating below which of the five items you will definitely be buying for your nearest and dearest.

The top item on my Christmas shopping list is…

Jumbo Sack O’ Agricultural Waste Matter

Wandering Mendicant’s Collapsed Lung, Preserved In Jelly

“Two-In-One” Marionette

Grow Your Own Marsh

The Radiating Lance Of Saint Poppo

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