Learning that the cathedral in Dubrovnik houses a holy relic of Christ’s nappy inspired me to write the first verse of a brand new Christmas carol.
Baby Jesus
You make me happy
In Dubrovnik
They’ve got your nappy
Readers may wish to add further verses in the Comments.
No time to tarry,
No time for dawdling,
All hasten to see
The holy swaddling…
The path is lit
By the gibbous moon
As we rush to adore
The cloth cocoon
Frankincense,
Wise men leave in their hampers,
Ideal Christmas gift?
A box of Pampers
I’ll get my banjolele…
I saw three shits
Come sailing by
Ding Dung Merrily
On high
the cloth is removed
by virgin tenderly
she’s sprayed with wine
that erst was wee.