Papist Mountain Apothecary

The mountain apothecary with his bag so black. Is it a bag or is it a sack? He heaves it up the mountain on his back. It is full of pills and potions.

But no one lives upon this peak. So as he climbs who does he seek? Ah, look, a goat, a goat so weak. He’ll pamper it with his lotions.

The mountain apothecary is no vet. The weakened goat’s our hero’s pet. He trapped it once, within a net. But now it roams the slopes.

The air is thin when one’s so high. The goat is weak and it may die. The apothecary wears a Catholic tie. He’s treated several Popes.

A Papist apothecary, do you say? On the mountain this very day? I would drown him in the bay, for I say he’s a sinner.

Aye, a sinner and a heretic! Evil is what makes him tick. Almighty God, he makes me sick. I’ll vomit up my dinner.

I ate in the chalet at the foot of the mount. Me and a baron and a Protestant count. Oh we ate a huge amount, of mountain goat and hog.

See the apothecary come back down. He’s taking his goat into the town, where there’s a vet of great renown. I’ll shove him into the bog.

“Papist Apothecary Drowned In Bog”, the headline in my Daily Log. Now I’ll march off into the fog, and vanish whence I came.

I came from haunts of coot and hern. There I watch the Papists burn. Repent! Before it is your turn, and shudder at my name.

4 thoughts on “Papist Mountain Apothecary

  1. A handful of tomorrow’s headlines …

    Teapots approach unanimity
    Typhus importation panacea
    No parasympathetic utopian
    Patchy anaemia opportunist
    Unhappy sarcomata petition
    Typecast humanitarian poop
    Aphasia appointment outcry
    Uppity inamorata’s cenotaph
    Unemphatic spotty paranoia
    Soppy traumata phonetician
    Apathetic parsnip autonomy
    Unanimity potato scrapheap
    Emancipation apathy stupor
    Appoint spaceman authority
    Sappy harmonica outpatient
    Appoint yeoman parachutist
    Anticipatory phantom pause
    Happy tapioca menstruation
    Unapparent sociopath amity
    Unhappy apostate mortician
    Pariah company outpatients
    Toucan’s empathy apparition
    Happy amputations reaction
    Paramount hepatitis canopy
    Trauma-syncopation epitaph
    Unsympathetic papa oration
    Companion statuary epitaph

  2. That is because by the time of the second album the power had gone to his head, quality control was forgotten and well…

    Ah tape poop tyrant musician

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