To enhance your Hooting Yard experience, and to provide you with unalloyed glee – or at the very least a short break from your habitual sobbing into a filthy napkin – it is recommended that you download Hooting Yard Service Pack 6.

Service Pack 6 contains a bundle of exciting features which integrate Hooting Yard with popular web drivel such as Witter, Faceditch, Dobsonpamphlet, Piffle, Skippy, Zippy and Michel Foucault’s Insurrection Of Subjugated Knowledges Lite. As an added bonus, this update will cause your computer to do a lot of buzzing and whirring for no apparent reason, and it may even hiss and emit jets of steam.

Press the button below when you are “in the zone”*. Note that the button will remain inactive until you enter “the zone”, which you can do by casting aside that filthy napkin and rereading every single word posted in Hooting Yard since December 2003, learning selected passages by heart, and then declaiming them in a booming voice from atop an atoll or a grassy knoll, stunning passers-by with your erudition.

* NOTE : The zone referred to ought not be confused with other zones into which you may be enticed from time to time.