We know that the important thing about any televised foopball match is the demented wittering of the commentators. The 2010 World Cup has, in that sense, reached its climax with just a week of matches played. For I do not believe any commentator, however bonkers, will be able to better the stupendous words declaimed during tonight’s France v. Mexico tie:
“For a moment there, he looked like a baby gazelle who’d just plopped out of the womb.”
Obviously written by someone who has never made his omelette with gazelles’ eggs.
There is much I find confusing about the game of foopball.
Like, why is Lou Reed managing our national team?
O.S.M. B:52
Whom better to turn to, for the necessary Busload of Faith?
Isn’t Wayne Rooney’s head on upside down?