In another German forest, tenebrous and dense

I stumbled through the duff until I reached a fence

I followed the fence for miles, rattling a stick

Was ever there a forest with German trees so thick?

Was ever there a hiking Herr as thick as myself?

The fence led me directly to the dwelling of an elf

It was an elf of untold sin, its heart as black as pitch

And with a hideous cackle it shoved me in a ditch

I crawled through the ditch but the trees grew thicker still

The sky was blotted out and I began to feel quite ill

I was undone by a German elf in a forest dark and drear

And all because I did not have the proper hiking gear

So get your boots from Hubermann’s, and your compass too

Or else you’ll get stuck in the woods of Woohoohoodiwoo