Untold numbers of Hooting Yard readers have been writing in with a single demand. What we expect, Mr Key, they all say, is regular lobster diagrams! We know what we want and we want them weekly! Whether this is a true reflection of the popular will or a sinister campaign to divert us from our important work I cannot say. As a sop to the protesters, however, here is a lobster diagram. You will note that it emphasises the location of the lobster’s brain, which is, incidentally, the subject of Pebblehead’s latest bestselling paperback, The Location Of The Lobster’s Brain.
I am enjoying the new new and exciting format but I do miss the quotes from forgotten yet important works. At the same time a new and important writer has been brought to our attention, Shaka Pebblehead. Would it be possible to read a quote or two from his (or her) work. Perhaps a paragraph or two from ‘A lobster’s brain’ or perhaps his (or her) work “They Selected The Burlap Sheaths For The Central Lever : True Stories Of Heroic Colour-Coding” or any other work that Mr Key would consider eddifying.
Yes, yes we must have more Lobster diagrams but….
I have to take exception at one of the anatomical details on this weeks diagram…
Modesty forbids me to repeat the name of the particular body part that has offended my sensibilities, so I will point to it…
There, I believe that you to will share my Lovecraftian horror and avoid a repeat of this offence.
Maybe, although we all enjoy a good lobster diagram, you should confine your attention to the more wholesome examples of aquatic fauna perhaps the ones with flippers.
The quotations from obscure works have not been discontinued, but I am taking a break from research. Be patient, and they will turn up again.
As for Shaka Pebblehead, there are difficulties obtaining permission to quote anything except titles. Being an author of bestselling paperbacks, he is surrounded by a phalanx of lawyers who will stop at nothing to protect his “brand”.